What’s your point?

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I’m afraid many of us have gotten through huge swaths of our lives without picking a reason for existing, and as a result feel lost at times.

I sort of had reasons. Squishy things like “be a good person.”

Here’s where it gets tough though.

Let’s say through magic you get an entire day free of responsibilities. Work closed due to too much sunshine. Your husband took the kids to an overnight at Aunt Helene’s. Took the dogs and the ferret too.

Here you sit–an entire day lay in front of you. How do you spend it?

Sort of paralyzing, right?

Why, though?

Opportunity cost. If I go to the beach, I can’t go to the craft fair. If I go to the craft fair, I can’t organize the garage. When you choose how to spend your time, inevitably there is “the thing you didn’t do” which can gnaw at you and suck the joy from your chosen activity. My kids call this FOMO, or Fear Of Missing Out.

So what to do about it?

Figure out what your values are, and do things in alignment with those values.

Brene Brown has a worksheet to help with this. There are dozens of values on the list, but she advises to limit yourself to two. Too many values is sort of like having no values.

I tried and failed at this, but was pointed to another, similar exercise. For this one, I got to choose five. Luxury!

So here’s what I came up with:

  • Service
  • Integrity
  • Challenge
  • Health
  • Creativity

Now, when I am faced with decisions about how to spend my time, I have a guidepost.

  • Eating 14 brownies? No. Not in alignment with my health value.
  • Figuring out how to fix someone’s sink? Sure. Works for service and challenge.
  • Watching every episode of ‘The Office’ over again? Hmmm. Nope.

There will always be more things you can do than you will have time for. You can use your values to make sure the things you choose to do move you in the direction you desire.

Figure out your values and use them to fight FOMO.


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